2/19/17

Akka is 80...Celebrations and Reminiscenses




80?

                   18                          



The many things you have done



All the times that you were there

Help me know deep down inside


How much you really cared



I knew we had to do something special to make 1st Feb'17  memorable for Akka.

The"leader" of the Ganesh clan had to be elaborately feted on her 80th birthday!

The matter came up one evening in Nov when Bashir,Pooja,I had gathered in Matheran for dinner. Bashir strongly recommended a get together of siblings to celebrate the occasion.
That's when I started the ball rolling!
From Srinath,my dear nephew,I learnt that he was pushing off to Chennai in mid Jan'17 along with Nandu and after attending a wedding in the family would come back to Goa with Akka in tow
Nothing could have been better... we could go to Goa and celebrate!!
Perhaps Whatsapp has not seen such  a flurry of msgs that were exchanged between me and Srinath/Nandu over the next few weeks.I also received confirmation from my brothers' Mohan and Ramani that they would attend.What was of paramount importance was the surprise element,to keep it a secret from Akka,who would utmost expect some phone calls and Whatsapp messages
Gopal was visiting his son and daughter in the U.S. and  returned just on the eve of our departure to USA.Not only did I inform him of our plan but also asked him to be discreet.
Meantime,Srinath had organised accommodation for all of us in a 3 bedroom flat just below his.What more could one ask for.Not only were we celebrating a landmark event but we will be together as a joint family for a few days!!! Excellent 
 1959-60....... 
மண்ணுக்கு மரம் பாரமா,மரத்துக்கு இலை பாரமா?
கொடிக்குக் காய் பாரமா,பெற்றெடுத்த குழந்தை தாய்க்கு பாரமா?
 What is the context?
I have to take you back a long time when Srinath and Nandu were not yet born.
Our mother was as unassuming as she was gentle and kind. A person of very few words she preferred to listen than talk and she listened to everybody and believed that the world was “filled with the milk of human kindness’ and she would be a part of it helping in her own way.I can say that I never knew what she was thinking at any moment…but thinking she did,lots of it. Manasai Kodaiyaradhu.

One early morning I heard her singing this song sitting next to Akka,still to get up from bed.Strange! Through the song mother was perhaps assuaging Akka,though deeply bothered about her unmarried state.Now,if you had crossed 23 those days,that was ripe old age for marriage and cause for parental concern...Lying in bed in the same room I understood it all and was disturbed. 
We went away to SFO,by a non-stop AI flight and for the first time we flew the eastern route over the Indian and Pacific.I had already shared many photos of Akka and other siblings,Amma and Periamma that was wanted by Nandu for the occasion.After a brief but wonderful get together with all of my family both at SFO and Tahoe we came back mid Jan.
1960-61.......

I wondered about the talk in the household about Akka's marriage.But,busy as Akka was in running the household,looking after a not very healthy mother and three young siblings she may not have thought very seriously about her status. Balu anna was away in England and then he was busy attending to shift duty at the Works. GG was always busy with his rowing,friends and club activity. Akka took up the responsibility that was thrust upon her young shoulders... nurturing, caring and grooming us.A mother couldn’t have done more. The one emotion of hers that I feared was "anger" if something veered from the straight and narrow.Who could blame her
Came the day when her knight in shining armour consented to have Akka as his wife.The elders were happy with joy,but I shed a tear or two when I had to part company with her.It was like losing a life line.Bombay was at another end of the country. 
It is very difficult to get past Akka with "loose lips".Even at 80 her mind is very alert.So,inspite of our best care to keep the matter confidential from her,some cats were let out of the bag.But,Bela behaved.Amends were made immediately with the hope that she had not caught on and soon we resorted to a special group in Whatsapp,where she was not included.She was also busy with the family wedding in Chennai; her only grandson Nishad had arrived from the UK to attend the wedding.  
 1961-62
I would eagerly write letters to Akka to keep her abreast of the news in Calcutta and addressed her as EEKES to convey my special excitement in communicating with her and signed as JOY,which name has stuck to me since.It was a great pleasure to see her back home in the winter of 61,on the eve of my Matriculation exams. Srinath was born,our first nephew! Phew! I remember studying in the same room where she was expected to rest alongside the baby on a cot.But she was wide awake coaxing me to keep studying Sanskrit till the wee hours of the morning inspite of my feeble protestation that nothing was entering my head.Later,I escorted mother and child to Bombay and spent two wonderful weeks acquainting myself with the discipline and culture of the City.

A small issue; An email arrived from Akka in ack to my Blog on SFO trip where she informed about her arrival in Goa on the 29th Jan.She also asked "when is your next trip planned" to which I replied"We do not have any major visit planned in Feb except to go to Matheran with Pooja,Bashir on 3rd and return on 6th Feb.A blatant lie.Apparently,she was very keen to attend a family function in Mumbai on 4th Feb and wanted my assurance that we will be in town to accommodate her,whereas we will be in Goa for the felicitation. So,my reply, put paid to that.
1963-64....
Mother needed a minor surgery to remove her Uterus which was acting up.So Akka came to Cal along with Babudhon,pet name for Srinath then,to lend support. Babudhon was adorable to say the least and we brothers had a gala time as he entertained us with his antics.It was also the time for me decide between Jadhavpur Uni and BIT and mother insisted that I should go away to BIT,inspite of the higher costs.The next five years I had very little contact with Akka except for a day's visit in 1968 during my Engg. college tour.

On the 1st of Feb,I/Sumee called and wished her and found her a bit frosty on the phone...or did I imagine it.We knew we will be meeting her later that day along with the rest of my brothers and their wives,who had all arrived on the previous day much to her surprise and JOY! In their  presence  Srinath was bemoaning the fact that I/Sumee was missed,though we were closest to Goa.As planned we arrived on schedule and taxied from the airport to Panjim and kept up texting  Nandu when they were all driving to Hotel Fidalgo for a Gujarati Thali at Bhojan.We reached before them and had to wait awhile before the party entered and took their seats at the restaurant.

1969-70.....
Usha Telehoist,the firm I joined as a Management Trainee sent me to their Faridabad factory after a few months in Cal.Commuted from Karol Bag to FBD everyday and that was fine since I had a couple of mates from BIT to meet up in the evenings and weekends.Soon I was assigned shift duties and I had to move to FBD to be in the vicinity of my factory.That was the beginning of the end of my career in UT.Not long after I took the Rajdhani and reached Akka/Amin in Bombay to turn over a new leaf.

She must have brooded as to why we were not there.Not a lover of food,she wouldn't have done the slightest justice to the never ending servings of Dhokla, Cutlets, Khadi, Phulka, Poori,Pulao Shrikhand and other accouterments of food that day. We entered and hugged her and her cup of Joy was running helter skelter seeing all her siblings and their wives.Togetherness at its best with only Meera missing.The party got on well,photos were taken,and at the conclusion of the grand lunch we had Paans in the lobby.Returning back to Prudential Pristine,to Srinath/Nandu's flat,we had Akka sitting between me and Ramani and it felt good to hug her. 
Early 70's
Meera my niece was a kid of three when I entered the portals of Akka's flat in Matunga as a bachelor looking for employment.I remember babysitting her whenever her parents went out.The only way to distract her from crying and keeping her quiet was to sing her fav songs which were: "chal chal chal mere Haathi" "Re mama Re mama re" "Hum bi agar bache Hothe" "Zindagi Ek Safar Hai Suhana" and I would have to repeat them continuously in any order that she wanted.Soon I went away to Poona to start my employment with Arco Whitney On this job I toured Chennai and Bangalore often,but was not enjoying my work.As I was wondering whether I should apply to IIM's,I had a break.I received the appointment letter from Vickers who I joined in Jan73. I continued my stay at Matunga.

There is no doubt that Prudential is a great place to get-together.Lush landscape,tree cover of palms,a small swimming pool and the serenity that prevails to allow GG to sleep for ever,and for Akka to keep walking up and down.Bella the Labrador was perhaps a bit confused,but being a darling she soon came around and wagged,nuzzled, licked,snuggled and settled into a comfortable position as one among us.
As the afternoon wore on it was time for gift presentation and Champagne,which was shown to the celebrity for approval and she wouldn't even see it.She just held a glass of water in her hand while the others toasted for her achievement and good health.She also gave return gifts to all the attendees.This was followed by more drinks and dinner
Next morning we went to the beach nearby and enjoyed a walk.Soon it was time for Mohan,Jayanthi to depart,due to some important chores back in Chennai.The next two days sped away in a blur that is only possible in a family meet. Food was distinctly vegetarian but for the Carnivore in our group.I could manage a bit of chicken and fish.Coffee and tea were taken for granted and so were the singing and photo sessions.And Bela the Lab was there going around as if monitoring the events and hopefully satisfied at the outcome.
Sample this:
GG would be humming "once there were green fields kissed  by the sun.....He was also puzzled by the gadget in his hand.
Ramani would sing and play the guitar with advise from Srinath on Note selection."Wrong Note"could be heard from across the long living room.
Nandu sang well and so did Radha and Akka,GG and Sumee proving that we could start "The Ganesh family Singers" We did it all Bengali, Hindi, Tamil, English ... Country,Pop,Patriotic,folk and kept ourselves entertained. Sumee was also advising people on travel matters and Srinath was advising the restaurants to deliver the food in time. 

1976-77......

I had settled into my career where I made steady progress going by the Sales figures.I was 28 and ready for marriage;Per tradition I would visit homes of prospective brides and on an occasion my acceptance of a girl was ruled out by Akka. Nothing was working out.I left on a long tour,dejected by the process....I saw Aandhi a great movie with my fav star Sanjeev and my fav song,very special because of what followed in my life.....
तुम आ गए हो, नूर आ गया है,नहीं तो चरागों से लौ जा रही थी
जीने की तुमसे, वजह मिल गयी है,बड़ी बेवजह जिन्दगी जा रही थी Why couldn't I get my Noor? I returned from the tour and   voilà Akka said she has found the right girl for me which I din't care to believe...but there she was.Well! she looked at me and I looked at her and I could feel that this was definitely the girl for me.Rest is..................sorry, was chemistry.We lost our mother in Feb '77,but I was happy she was there for my wedding which was a grand affair.Later, when we moved to our own small Apt in Santacruz,it was Periamma,Akka/Amin,Balu Anna,Mama and Mami who gave us blessings for a good start in life.




                                                     

                                                  
Icing on the cake:


On 3rd Feb,all except Srinath,Sumee and I left for a veg meal at Tato's. We were awaiting a final surprise to be unraveled and right enough Bashir,Pooja and Aryaan arrived and we quickly went away to a nearby restaurant for lunch.The cup of Akka's Joy that was running helter-skelter,now skyrocketed when she saw her fav Pooja and Bashir and also Aryaaan. The household went crazy, all of them engaged in banter with Aryaan who had a sweet reply to everyone.Bela's tail wagged even more seeing a youngster in the crowd.After a round of Coffee,BPA headed to the pool and we all followed to watch the spectacle of A in the pool.He took to Ramani very well; climbed his shoulders,strummed his guitar and enjoyed his company. BPA headed to the beach next morning while we were content to go to a Udupi lunch home.More swimming at the pool,wine and singing followed.On our last day we headed to Zeebob a rustic beach side restaurant in Colva serving locally fished seafood and other cuisine.It was GG's treat to all of us,a fitting finale!Thanks GG




                         Thus ended a well planned and executed project,Akka 80.I will be failing in my task (sic) if I don't propose a vote of thanks to all participants and especially to Nandu and Srinath who so graciously agreed to host the occasion,untiringly and with much zeal... inspite of their very busy schedule. Aryaan and Bela you were the cynosure of all eyes.I will now hand over the mike to Vasantha Dorairaj to say a lot of words.After all,she is 80!

Till we meet again!
_______________________________________________________________________